Ok, I'll start by saying that I don't check this much, and I'm sorry for being such a slacker, but in general I just try to avoid computers so I can't help it. Although I must say that once a month when I do look at this it's SO nice to read about what everyone is up to. It sounds like life is far from dull for all of you, and what more can you ask for?
And Kaitlin, popular? geesh, good luck with that. I'm sure with some more time you will find the people who you truely jive with and care about. Don't be afraid to branch out, you never know who else is out there untill you look.
Well, I just finished my first week or so on the Harvey Gamage. I'll admit, I was nervous at first, more afraid to dissapoint the captain or not like the new crew than anything else. Turns out, the crew is a bunch of rock stars, two old friends from last summer, a guy I sailed with on Niagara back in the day, and some new faces that I hit it off with right away. The quirks of sailing her came back to me as if I'd never left and we enjoyed a beautiful sail from New London CT to Booth Bay Maine with 22 boys on board between the ages of 8 and 72. Yea... one strange trip, but an important one because OCF is going to move their office to Booth Bay this year and the Gamage is to become the flagship of OCF and Booth Bay. So we were greeted by thwards of bigwigs, several mimosas in, spent hours on deck giving tours, and were then rewarded with tons of pizza and beer. Not a bad deal.
Tomorrow offically starts my contract as educator. We don't actually leave Booth Bay until Sept 15th-ish so I get a couple weeks to work on my lesson plans (Amanda I feel your pain, it's so much work!). For now I'm chillin in Gloucester MA for the 2007 Schooner races on Spirit of Massachusettes and to just enjoy the festivities that come with it. Yea... OCF is a big fan of throwing kegs for its crew, I can't complain. Tonight's has an island theme... geez its like I'm right back in college again.
So the fall trip starts in a couple weeks. The schedule is completely tentative due to weather and of course current political conditions, but past port stops have included:
-Mystic, CT or New London
-Somewhere in Chesapeake Bay, and possible NYC or Baltimore
-Charlston, SC
-Miami, FL
-The Bahamas!
-Puerto Rico and Dominican Republic (these two are the only definates as of now)
-Culebra
-Haiti
-Cuba
-Venezuala or Belize
Who knows! In November I'll let you know where I've been.
Bon Voyage!
-Kim
Friday, August 31, 2007
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Overwhelmed and Underprepared
Well, this is it and I can't write much because I have to be up at 7 for my first OFFICIAL day as a NYC teacher.
I'm excited.
But on the verge of tears.
My room is a mess with all my papers and lesson plans and books.
I'm just scared I won't cut it.
But it seems that every time I think I can't climb that mountain (thank you robert ballard, you boring bastard) I've reached the top before I know it. I just think this is going to be my longest climb yet.
I think the trick is to ACT like I can do it. To PRETEND I am 150% confident, because somewhere along the way, hopefully, I'll earn it.
Ok, I have to type out the mini-unit I devised for my first two weeks of World History.
Here goes nothing...
I'm excited.
But on the verge of tears.
My room is a mess with all my papers and lesson plans and books.
I'm just scared I won't cut it.
But it seems that every time I think I can't climb that mountain (thank you robert ballard, you boring bastard) I've reached the top before I know it. I just think this is going to be my longest climb yet.
I think the trick is to ACT like I can do it. To PRETEND I am 150% confident, because somewhere along the way, hopefully, I'll earn it.
Ok, I have to type out the mini-unit I devised for my first two weeks of World History.
Here goes nothing...
Monday, August 27, 2007
This message will self-destruct in...
You have a mission. All of you. And that mission is....
go to: http://telluride.plumtv.com/stories/tellurides_dog_month
and vote for Jax. (yes, I took that picture)
And then get at least one other friend to vote for him, too. (Or your parents).
And just in case you don't think a picture is worth a thousand words... Jax lies on my feet every morning during our live show to keep my toes warm. He greets me at the office every day with a whole-body wag (his tail is kind of tiny), and when I get tired, he lets me use him as a pillow. He's super friendly and likes to give kisses, and he'll play with you for hours on end until he poops out and curls up under your desk to rest. He's currently losing the dog of the month contest by almost 20 votes.
Doesn't it feel good to vote for the underdog?
go to: http://telluride.plumtv.com/stories/tellurides_dog_month
and vote for Jax. (yes, I took that picture)
And then get at least one other friend to vote for him, too. (Or your parents).
And just in case you don't think a picture is worth a thousand words... Jax lies on my feet every morning during our live show to keep my toes warm. He greets me at the office every day with a whole-body wag (his tail is kind of tiny), and when I get tired, he lets me use him as a pillow. He's super friendly and likes to give kisses, and he'll play with you for hours on end until he poops out and curls up under your desk to rest. He's currently losing the dog of the month contest by almost 20 votes.
Doesn't it feel good to vote for the underdog?
Hello from California
So, I've moved out here to California. I've been here for a little less than two weeks now, and I am definitely overwhelmed by all of the changes.
Life out here is... well, it's a lot like high school. I guess the best way to get to this point is to start from the beginning and bring you up to speed.
I started orientation last Monday, and it went all week. I had met my roommate, Ashley, over the weekend. She and I got along for the weekend, and I thought she was pretty sweet. When orientation started on Monday, we were split up into groups, and Ashley and I were separated, which was fine. I was actually put into Chris Ferrantino's orientation group, which was nice. That night, we had our first mixer and then a bunch of us went out to a bar afterward. It was clear to me on that night that I was going to kind of have to fight to become friends with some of the other producers, as this girl named Rachel (a fellow producer) had targeted Ashley as the friend to have, and they were quickly making themselves "the popular girls." My take on the matter was that I was not in high school and was hardly going to beg to be liked. I graduated high school a long time ago, and I had no interest in returning.
As the week progressed, to make a long story short, Rachel, Ashley, another girl named Christina, and I all started to hang out more and more. Soon, we became what someone dubbed "the it girls," which made me kind of uncomfortable. Somehow, I found myself in that little "popular girls" group that I stopped wanting to be a part of when I got into college and realized that I'd rather make friends I liked than friends that people would judge me favorably (yet superficially) for. Interestingly, each year (we've been told), there seems to be a group of producer girls who kind of become the "it" people who tend to be at the center of the social scene. I suppose it's good that I found myself here, but it is hardly without frustration.
See, I don't really care to be in this position. I'm here to make movies, and there are a lot of people that I'd like to be friends with. But as time here has gone on, I've come to realize that this is what the world is like out here - full of popularity contests and such, which ends up having a huge factor on professional decisions. Furthermore, it is the people with the most promise in the business that tend to be the most popular, and I have no doubt (not to sound conceited) that I will find myself successful here in an academic and professional manner. It is, after all, what I am here for. And I can certainly see this paying off - we've been the first people invited to parties and events and such, which is where I can already see most networking is done, and last night some of the second-year producers took us out for drinks.
Along the same lines, I also find myself sort of frustrated with this group of girls. At first, I thought that Rachel was kind of stopping me from being a part of the group (I certainly did have to struggle to be a part of this), as she totally targeted Ashley. But more and more, I can see that I'm getting closer to Rachel but that socially, Ashley seems reluctant to really get to know me or hang out with me. When the four of us girls are out, Ashley seems keen to share secrets with Rachel right in front of me, kind of giggling while she freely makes me feel excluded. It frustrates me a lot, because at parties and the like, I find myself going back to these girls as something of a "home base," since all of these new people can get overwhelming and it can be nice to have people to depend on in these big groups. But Ashley doesn't seem to really want to include me in that.... so.. yea. It kind of makes me feel like she's a big bitch, but when it's the two of us we tend to get along pretty well. It's kind of confusing. Anyway, I'm liking Rachel more and more everyday, and Christina and I definitely get along well.
So there's already drama, and it's already complicated.
It really, really, really makes me miss you guys.
On the other hand, I have definitely already been targeted as a "powerhouse producer," which I totally love. I think there's a certain personality type that people look out for in my profession, and I have definitely done well making a first impression in this manner. Second-years tend to like me, which is great. This one girl, Liz, is a second-year who I've heard is the powerhouse producer in her year, and she has definitely taken a liking to me. I couldn't be happier about that, because these guys are the ones that hire us for sets.
Getting hired by older grad students is the biggest thing around here - classes don't really matter, but you try to get hired on as many movies as you can handle, as that's where you get to know the most people and gain the most experience.
Speaking of which!!!! I've gotten hired!!!! Annnnd by a REALLY CUTE BOY!
Ok, sorry for the explosion. From here on out, I'll be talking about boys. And, sort of, about the position for which I've been hired. Feel free to stop reading here if you so desire.
So there's this ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS third-year director (I think he's about 24 or 25) amed Mike, who I met on the first day and was immediately struck by how attractive he was. He's about 6'4" or 6'5", which is really attractive to me. He and I got to talking on Friday night at the third mixer we had, while we were in a big circle of people. We started joking around and having tons of fun, and we really hit it off. Later, at the party that followed the mixer (god, I am SO in California), he and I got to talking again, this time just the two of us. We were laughing the whole time and getting along so well - we ended up hanging out for about half an hour, and we had a ton of fun together. Then, we got to talking about his movie - which I got so excited about - and he hired me to be his second second assistant director, which is one of the best jobs a first-year producer can get at the beginning! I was so honored. Before I left the party, he and I joked around about how my first assignment was to facebook him as soon as I got home... but then when I did get home, he had already friended me. And then we had a little facebook wall exchange. I'm not complaining.
He's not the only new crush I have, either! The other guy is named Ryan, and he's a 23 year-old first-year Cinematographer. He's funny, sarcastic, and smart, and he and I have a lot in common. He's a huge Disney fan, which not only gives us a lot of common ground, but also gives us a place we both love to hang out. On the Wednesday night mixer, he and I hung out at the bar together for like 2 hours (with other people), and we hit it off really well - that is, until he met my roommate and (I'm pretty sure) developed a little crush on her. She has a boyfriend, but still - ever since then, things haven't been quite as fun between Ryan and me. I'm sure I'm overthinking things, but still. I have enough drama going on with these girls - I don't need boy drama, too.
We'll see how things go. For now, I have a new home to get to know, classes to start, friends to make and bond with, and boys to look at. Things are intensely overwhelming, but it's all very exciting.
Miss and love you guys, as always.
Life out here is... well, it's a lot like high school. I guess the best way to get to this point is to start from the beginning and bring you up to speed.
I started orientation last Monday, and it went all week. I had met my roommate, Ashley, over the weekend. She and I got along for the weekend, and I thought she was pretty sweet. When orientation started on Monday, we were split up into groups, and Ashley and I were separated, which was fine. I was actually put into Chris Ferrantino's orientation group, which was nice. That night, we had our first mixer and then a bunch of us went out to a bar afterward. It was clear to me on that night that I was going to kind of have to fight to become friends with some of the other producers, as this girl named Rachel (a fellow producer) had targeted Ashley as the friend to have, and they were quickly making themselves "the popular girls." My take on the matter was that I was not in high school and was hardly going to beg to be liked. I graduated high school a long time ago, and I had no interest in returning.
As the week progressed, to make a long story short, Rachel, Ashley, another girl named Christina, and I all started to hang out more and more. Soon, we became what someone dubbed "the it girls," which made me kind of uncomfortable. Somehow, I found myself in that little "popular girls" group that I stopped wanting to be a part of when I got into college and realized that I'd rather make friends I liked than friends that people would judge me favorably (yet superficially) for. Interestingly, each year (we've been told), there seems to be a group of producer girls who kind of become the "it" people who tend to be at the center of the social scene. I suppose it's good that I found myself here, but it is hardly without frustration.
See, I don't really care to be in this position. I'm here to make movies, and there are a lot of people that I'd like to be friends with. But as time here has gone on, I've come to realize that this is what the world is like out here - full of popularity contests and such, which ends up having a huge factor on professional decisions. Furthermore, it is the people with the most promise in the business that tend to be the most popular, and I have no doubt (not to sound conceited) that I will find myself successful here in an academic and professional manner. It is, after all, what I am here for. And I can certainly see this paying off - we've been the first people invited to parties and events and such, which is where I can already see most networking is done, and last night some of the second-year producers took us out for drinks.
Along the same lines, I also find myself sort of frustrated with this group of girls. At first, I thought that Rachel was kind of stopping me from being a part of the group (I certainly did have to struggle to be a part of this), as she totally targeted Ashley. But more and more, I can see that I'm getting closer to Rachel but that socially, Ashley seems reluctant to really get to know me or hang out with me. When the four of us girls are out, Ashley seems keen to share secrets with Rachel right in front of me, kind of giggling while she freely makes me feel excluded. It frustrates me a lot, because at parties and the like, I find myself going back to these girls as something of a "home base," since all of these new people can get overwhelming and it can be nice to have people to depend on in these big groups. But Ashley doesn't seem to really want to include me in that.... so.. yea. It kind of makes me feel like she's a big bitch, but when it's the two of us we tend to get along pretty well. It's kind of confusing. Anyway, I'm liking Rachel more and more everyday, and Christina and I definitely get along well.
So there's already drama, and it's already complicated.
It really, really, really makes me miss you guys.
On the other hand, I have definitely already been targeted as a "powerhouse producer," which I totally love. I think there's a certain personality type that people look out for in my profession, and I have definitely done well making a first impression in this manner. Second-years tend to like me, which is great. This one girl, Liz, is a second-year who I've heard is the powerhouse producer in her year, and she has definitely taken a liking to me. I couldn't be happier about that, because these guys are the ones that hire us for sets.
Getting hired by older grad students is the biggest thing around here - classes don't really matter, but you try to get hired on as many movies as you can handle, as that's where you get to know the most people and gain the most experience.
Speaking of which!!!! I've gotten hired!!!! Annnnd by a REALLY CUTE BOY!
Ok, sorry for the explosion. From here on out, I'll be talking about boys. And, sort of, about the position for which I've been hired. Feel free to stop reading here if you so desire.
So there's this ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS third-year director (I think he's about 24 or 25) amed Mike, who I met on the first day and was immediately struck by how attractive he was. He's about 6'4" or 6'5", which is really attractive to me. He and I got to talking on Friday night at the third mixer we had, while we were in a big circle of people. We started joking around and having tons of fun, and we really hit it off. Later, at the party that followed the mixer (god, I am SO in California), he and I got to talking again, this time just the two of us. We were laughing the whole time and getting along so well - we ended up hanging out for about half an hour, and we had a ton of fun together. Then, we got to talking about his movie - which I got so excited about - and he hired me to be his second second assistant director, which is one of the best jobs a first-year producer can get at the beginning! I was so honored. Before I left the party, he and I joked around about how my first assignment was to facebook him as soon as I got home... but then when I did get home, he had already friended me. And then we had a little facebook wall exchange. I'm not complaining.
He's not the only new crush I have, either! The other guy is named Ryan, and he's a 23 year-old first-year Cinematographer. He's funny, sarcastic, and smart, and he and I have a lot in common. He's a huge Disney fan, which not only gives us a lot of common ground, but also gives us a place we both love to hang out. On the Wednesday night mixer, he and I hung out at the bar together for like 2 hours (with other people), and we hit it off really well - that is, until he met my roommate and (I'm pretty sure) developed a little crush on her. She has a boyfriend, but still - ever since then, things haven't been quite as fun between Ryan and me. I'm sure I'm overthinking things, but still. I have enough drama going on with these girls - I don't need boy drama, too.
We'll see how things go. For now, I have a new home to get to know, classes to start, friends to make and bond with, and boys to look at. Things are intensely overwhelming, but it's all very exciting.
Miss and love you guys, as always.
Friday, August 24, 2007
DANG IT!
Well after speaking with my old boss who got wind of my injury, it appears i wont be starting work just yet. He was originally going to have me help out doing a fair amount of heavy lifting in the shellfish hatchery a couple days a week. although i can no longer perform such tasks, he did inform me that there will be an educator position at one of the other offices but wont start until mid to late September. my boss got word in about me to the "Big Guy" and i should get the job, just have to hold my breath a little longer...in the meantime i will get occasional calls for any paper work or data entry.
Boredom continues to grow almost exponentially! Being unemployed and injured blows!!!
Feel free to come to the island for a visit!
Boredom continues to grow almost exponentially! Being unemployed and injured blows!!!
Feel free to come to the island for a visit!
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
Sunday, August 19, 2007
I belong on the MTV show Scarred
Finally, any day nowI will begin a job going back to work for Cornell Coop. Ext. Marine program. While there i will be doing data entry and research. i will however continue to look for other jobs in more specfic areas and may one day move out of this house
Now this posting is takin me a rather long time because well...I broke my right arm, hence the title to this post. The day aftter my bday i decided would be a good day to go for a bike ride. as i pulled up to a stop sign i waited for the car that had pulled up to go ahead but he was insistent i go first so i went. as i went im not sure if the chain came off (which was later discovered on the bike by my father) or because i took a hand off the handle bar to make a courteous gesture toward the man who waited for me but i lost control of the bike and fell right in front of his car (having been pedaling at maybe 5mph). Do not read the next paragraph if you become a little queesy when listening to stories like this...
as i rose i felt immense pain and as seen on the show Scarred it was quite clear that i broke my arm as the forearm was bent slightly and the break was evident but did not break the skin...an ambulance was called by a couple of witnesses and the ride to the hospital was a bitch... thankfully i had with me wallet and cell. my mom was not surprised when i told her i broke my arm on the phone.
anyway, surgery wasa must and i will be in a cast for 4-6 weeks and therapy after that summing out to 3+ months. ive believed and it contnues to be true that the mistakes ive made while with someone have are the reason i am to be punished with these freak trips to the hospital...i do miss whit very much but she has decided she only wants to be friends...sucks a lot but i understand and know that she is one i have learned from here on out. just hope i can still give her the necklace i made for her earlier in the summer (see below)..i like to hope theres still a chance i can get her back one day even if its a long ways away...
You may remember the center shell as the i found on our last full day in Puerto Rico while shell searching with jamanda at Vieques(thanks for letting me use your goggles). A boring sponge had bored a hole in center of that shell and i knew right then that this would be great to use in a necklace for Whit. (of course everything else was purchased at Michael's). i hope she'll take it.
Now this posting is takin me a rather long time because well...I broke my right arm, hence the title to this post. The day aftter my bday i decided would be a good day to go for a bike ride. as i pulled up to a stop sign i waited for the car that had pulled up to go ahead but he was insistent i go first so i went. as i went im not sure if the chain came off (which was later discovered on the bike by my father) or because i took a hand off the handle bar to make a courteous gesture toward the man who waited for me but i lost control of the bike and fell right in front of his car (having been pedaling at maybe 5mph). Do not read the next paragraph if you become a little queesy when listening to stories like this...
as i rose i felt immense pain and as seen on the show Scarred it was quite clear that i broke my arm as the forearm was bent slightly and the break was evident but did not break the skin...an ambulance was called by a couple of witnesses and the ride to the hospital was a bitch... thankfully i had with me wallet and cell. my mom was not surprised when i told her i broke my arm on the phone.
anyway, surgery wasa must and i will be in a cast for 4-6 weeks and therapy after that summing out to 3+ months. ive believed and it contnues to be true that the mistakes ive made while with someone have are the reason i am to be punished with these freak trips to the hospital...i do miss whit very much but she has decided she only wants to be friends...sucks a lot but i understand and know that she is one i have learned from here on out. just hope i can still give her the necklace i made for her earlier in the summer (see below)..i like to hope theres still a chance i can get her back one day even if its a long ways away...
You may remember the center shell as the i found on our last full day in Puerto Rico while shell searching with jamanda at Vieques(thanks for letting me use your goggles). A boring sponge had bored a hole in center of that shell and i knew right then that this would be great to use in a necklace for Whit. (of course everything else was purchased at Michael's). i hope she'll take it.
Saturday, August 18, 2007
Update
So they wouldn't talk....they couldnt give up ten minutes of drinking and video games to let me talk to them about how i feel and what they did to me. All i needed was ten minutes. I'm done with them...i'm done...they really don't care
Thursday, August 16, 2007
And so it ends...
My last day living in Telluride, Colorado, will be Saturday, September 15th, when at 2pm precisely I will board a tiny, 40 passenger Canadair jet (you know, the one with the extra comfy seats and the cabin so short the flight attendents have to crane their necks as they come down the aisle) on my way to Boston. Home.
But it's not over. Actually, it's just beginning. Because a few days later, I'll join the rest of the Telluride crew in their tiny, cramped van (8 passenger) on their way to Woods Hole and Martha's Vineyard, where we will unpack our bags in 15 houses and hotels around the old whaling community of Edgartown along with the rest of the company from all over the nation, and where I will be receiving my very first, honest to God, job offer. Say hello to Jamanda, soon to be Martha's Vineyard local and official preditor (producer/editor)!
Pretty SWEET!
I'll have a week at home before I officially start on October 1st, so if anyone is in the area, I'd love to hang out. Also, once I find a place to stay, you all have an open invitation to visit anytime you want. Fall on the vineyard is absolutely spectacular; the weather is still nice, the water still warm, and the crowds have all left to go back to their jobs/school/retirement homes in Miami.
I'm going to miss Telluride. I've made some great friends. I'm going to miss free transportation, deer running across the road, marmots under the gondola, the free box, my unfurnished apartment, Olathe sweet sweet corn, Tommy's Pub, my dance classes, and mountains. I've gotten to participate in or get free passes to events that people travel to from all over the world. In a few weekends, I'll be rubbing shoulders with the rich and famous during the Telluride Film Fest (second only to Sundance) when I usher at the theater events. I can't imagine it getting much better.
But it will. Because I'm coming home, to all of you, who will find it much easier to visit a small island off Cape Cod rather then making your way over mountain ranges and hundreds of miles to a rural, resort town called Telluride. And I'll find it easier to get to you all, too.
And so it begins...
But it's not over. Actually, it's just beginning. Because a few days later, I'll join the rest of the Telluride crew in their tiny, cramped van (8 passenger) on their way to Woods Hole and Martha's Vineyard, where we will unpack our bags in 15 houses and hotels around the old whaling community of Edgartown along with the rest of the company from all over the nation, and where I will be receiving my very first, honest to God, job offer. Say hello to Jamanda, soon to be Martha's Vineyard local and official preditor (producer/editor)!
Pretty SWEET!
I'll have a week at home before I officially start on October 1st, so if anyone is in the area, I'd love to hang out. Also, once I find a place to stay, you all have an open invitation to visit anytime you want. Fall on the vineyard is absolutely spectacular; the weather is still nice, the water still warm, and the crowds have all left to go back to their jobs/school/retirement homes in Miami.
I'm going to miss Telluride. I've made some great friends. I'm going to miss free transportation, deer running across the road, marmots under the gondola, the free box, my unfurnished apartment, Olathe sweet sweet corn, Tommy's Pub, my dance classes, and mountains. I've gotten to participate in or get free passes to events that people travel to from all over the world. In a few weekends, I'll be rubbing shoulders with the rich and famous during the Telluride Film Fest (second only to Sundance) when I usher at the theater events. I can't imagine it getting much better.
But it will. Because I'm coming home, to all of you, who will find it much easier to visit a small island off Cape Cod rather then making your way over mountain ranges and hundreds of miles to a rural, resort town called Telluride. And I'll find it easier to get to you all, too.
And so it begins...
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Hey all,
So yeah, I guess its been awhile since I posted, I hope everyone is doing well and has had a good summer. Rose, best of luck to you in Germany! As for the rest of you, best of luck with whatever you're currently pursuing!
I just moved to Boston, finally! I had been trying to get my ass up here all summer, and now I can concentrate on getting stuff done. My summer has been pretty quiet: a lot of reading, going to the gym, hanging out with friends from home, and seeing Transformers and Live Free Or Die Hard. I haven't found a job yet, but truthfully that's because I wasn't looking hard while I was at home. I wanted to work in Boston, but I wanted to work while I was living in Boston, because I was trying to avoid commuting (I did it last summer, and it absolutely sucked). But I just moved here with a buddy of mine from home, so now I can really buckle down and look for work! We've got an awesome place that's 10 minutes from the Prudential Center, 5 minutes from Northeastern and like 6 blocks or so from Fenway Park. The location absolutely rocks the house, and we're already getting acclimated to the area. I saw this really good band play at a bar in Cambridge, they're called Jukebox The Ghost. And I just came back from a Sox game tonight, they won 2 -1 against the D-Rays: Lowell homered in the bottom of the 9th to tie the game, then Coco Crisp brought home the winning run. It was a great game, and considerably better than the last one I went to (where they got crushed 15-3 by the A's).
So yeah, apart from the last few days, things have been pretty ordinary on my end, but I figured I should at least post once this summer. Anyway, I hope everyone is doing well, and I miss you guys!
- Seb
So yeah, I guess its been awhile since I posted, I hope everyone is doing well and has had a good summer. Rose, best of luck to you in Germany! As for the rest of you, best of luck with whatever you're currently pursuing!
I just moved to Boston, finally! I had been trying to get my ass up here all summer, and now I can concentrate on getting stuff done. My summer has been pretty quiet: a lot of reading, going to the gym, hanging out with friends from home, and seeing Transformers and Live Free Or Die Hard. I haven't found a job yet, but truthfully that's because I wasn't looking hard while I was at home. I wanted to work in Boston, but I wanted to work while I was living in Boston, because I was trying to avoid commuting (I did it last summer, and it absolutely sucked). But I just moved here with a buddy of mine from home, so now I can really buckle down and look for work! We've got an awesome place that's 10 minutes from the Prudential Center, 5 minutes from Northeastern and like 6 blocks or so from Fenway Park. The location absolutely rocks the house, and we're already getting acclimated to the area. I saw this really good band play at a bar in Cambridge, they're called Jukebox The Ghost. And I just came back from a Sox game tonight, they won 2 -1 against the D-Rays: Lowell homered in the bottom of the 9th to tie the game, then Coco Crisp brought home the winning run. It was a great game, and considerably better than the last one I went to (where they got crushed 15-3 by the A's).
So yeah, apart from the last few days, things have been pretty ordinary on my end, but I figured I should at least post once this summer. Anyway, I hope everyone is doing well, and I miss you guys!
- Seb
Monday, August 13, 2007
auf wiedersehen!
So, I'm leaving in 9 hours to go to germany. i will be taking a language course for 6 weeks in marburg, and then i'm moving to munich until next july. it's a really big change for me, totally different from studying abroad in some ways, but yet hopefully not too much more challenging. at this point i have no idea what to expect, or what's to be expected of me. i hope to meet amazing people, learn a great language, and really come to understand another culture. if you ever are in europe, you are more than welcome to stay with me. i mean it. really. or i will come visit you wherever you are. it's sad to know that i won't be able to be home in lexington or boston or new york or new london for an entire year, but i look forward to all the crazy experiences i will be having. i hope you all have fabulous years doing whatever it is you will be doing, and i will keep in touch as much as i can.
love rose
love rose
Friday, August 10, 2007
This is me venting....
Ever feel like people don't try to listen or even care to acknowledge what you have to say? That your voice is somehow in some way insignificant and trivial in comparison to what someone else has to say? I've felt like this for a while now and I, within the past two nights, I have hit my breaking point, sending me into this funk and depression that I haven't experienced in such a long while. And to think, its my two best friends at home who've done this to me. Because of their inability to consider for once what I may think or have to say, I am left in a silent state of tears in my room, suppressing whatever anger and sadness i may feel so as not hurt anybody else's feelings. And for what? Just to keep feeling like a body taking up space in this world without a purpose because I can't get up the nerve to say how i really feel so that i don't hurt someone else's feelings? Bullshit, complete bullshit. I have no clue why I've done this to myself and I'm tired of it and refuse to submit to it any longer. No one should ever make you feel less of a person and my two friends, the two people who have been there through ALL of my trials and tribulations through the years (and me for every single one of theirs) are the last people I would imagine would do this to me. Leaving me at 1 in the morning, listening to Queen's Who Wants to Live Forever, crying silently to myself because the lyrics make my heart ache, considering for myself "who waits forever ever anyway?" I can't really explain what this song does for me, probably the most depressing and beautiful Queen song ever written, brings me to tears no matter where i am when i hear it simply because it makes me consider my own existence and self worth. Yet somewhere in the lyrics I find some semblance of hope, I am stronger than this and will be able to find that one sweet moment that is set aside for me. Usually, when i cry because of this song its because of this beauty and its ability to say so simply exactly how I feel but lately it has made my cry from pain. And it's not fair.
It was two nights ago that I had this revelation about them and this self crisis began. I was sitting in Evan's living room with him and sean, watching The Dirty Dozen and talking. But i noticed something that I've made myself blind to for far too long. They start to talk about something they know I can't have any impute on (the comic book they're writing together, the video games they play). Now I have no problem with their doing this but its when I DO TRY to say something to enter the conversation, they ignore it completely, and that bothers me. But it didn't stop there. I would start to talk about something important to ME that I want to express to them and one of them will cut me off and start up the conversation I can't join, leaving my thought waiting in this void, never able to escape and be heard again. It doesn't matter what I may have to say, significant, stupid, or funny, they cut me off. Then once they finish whatever was so important to them they ask "oh yea, what did you say jess?" All i can ever muster is "nothing important no worries." NOTHING IMPORTANT? No matter what I have to say, no matter what it is, if its important even for me to say it should be important enough for them to want to fucking listen to it the first time around. When i left, I drove home fighting back tears. I shouldn't have to do that.
It was last night that I completely had it. Iwi had came to visit for the day and night. I was so excited to see her and have her meet the two people I have told her so much about and vice versa. But what did they do? They did the same thing they do to me to her, made no effort to talk to her or get to know her in the slightest. I was so hurt that they couldn't give up their video games for one night to try and get to know this person that means so much to me. Getting them out to a bar just to sit around and talk was like pulling teeth. Evan's gf sydney was the godsend for the night, being the only one to talk, ACTUALLY talk to Iwi. Evan and Sean sat there mumbling to each other as Sean ate sugar packets because that was more interesting to them then talking to the rest of us. I don't even think those two boys could tell you where Iwi is from, that's how much they tried to get to know her. I was embarrassed by them and above all pissed off. Funny enough, we ran into Lucy Arnold in the bar because she lives in Princeton and went to the school across the street from mine, and we we're talking to with her. Close to when we we're going to leave, Iwi got up to say good bye to her, since she knew her a lot better than i ever did. While Iwi was gone the two boys sat there and then Sean after a bit said "when are we finally gonna leave?" Then evan said "As soon as kiwi or whatever her name is comes back." I broke. I completely broke at that point, biting back with "Thanks a lot guys. Her name is Iwi, you should know that. I am pissed right now." They looked at me like I was nuts. I told them that I felt like they made no effort to talk to her and they sat there in silence for several minutes, looking bored out of their minds. Finally, I got up and said "I'll go get Iwi so you can leave. Don't worry" followed by an exchange that can be be summed up as lame attempts to make me not feel like i had to get her and me bitterly saying over and over again, "oh no, don't bother."
I was crushed, completely crushed. How dare you treat my friend, one of my closest, like that EVER? How...dare...you? Writing this right now I'm crying thinking of how little they consider what I feel or think and more importantly, how Iwi must have felt to have two people treat her as if she was some random person. I am so annoyed, so incredibly hurt and feel as if what I think or feel means nothings. I mean nothing to them. If i did, they wouldn't have acted like complete assholes. My entire existence was belittled by these two jackasses and then they had the nerve to do it to Iwi. I have a voice, i have opinions, and above all, i have feelings that should be respected. And right now, I feel like shit under their shoes.
So much has been rambling around my head lately and I'm just confused about so much. I hate this feeling and I don't know how i got back here, having worked so hard to get myself out of my deep depression. Don't worry, it's not as bad as it has been, no where near, but i know this feeling, that feeling right before everything snowballs out of control. I had to write this to stop that snowball and I needed other people to know what I'm thinking because I know that all of you do care and have and listen to what i have to say. So thank you. From the bottom of my heart.
It was two nights ago that I had this revelation about them and this self crisis began. I was sitting in Evan's living room with him and sean, watching The Dirty Dozen and talking. But i noticed something that I've made myself blind to for far too long. They start to talk about something they know I can't have any impute on (the comic book they're writing together, the video games they play). Now I have no problem with their doing this but its when I DO TRY to say something to enter the conversation, they ignore it completely, and that bothers me. But it didn't stop there. I would start to talk about something important to ME that I want to express to them and one of them will cut me off and start up the conversation I can't join, leaving my thought waiting in this void, never able to escape and be heard again. It doesn't matter what I may have to say, significant, stupid, or funny, they cut me off. Then once they finish whatever was so important to them they ask "oh yea, what did you say jess?" All i can ever muster is "nothing important no worries." NOTHING IMPORTANT? No matter what I have to say, no matter what it is, if its important even for me to say it should be important enough for them to want to fucking listen to it the first time around. When i left, I drove home fighting back tears. I shouldn't have to do that.
It was last night that I completely had it. Iwi had came to visit for the day and night. I was so excited to see her and have her meet the two people I have told her so much about and vice versa. But what did they do? They did the same thing they do to me to her, made no effort to talk to her or get to know her in the slightest. I was so hurt that they couldn't give up their video games for one night to try and get to know this person that means so much to me. Getting them out to a bar just to sit around and talk was like pulling teeth. Evan's gf sydney was the godsend for the night, being the only one to talk, ACTUALLY talk to Iwi. Evan and Sean sat there mumbling to each other as Sean ate sugar packets because that was more interesting to them then talking to the rest of us. I don't even think those two boys could tell you where Iwi is from, that's how much they tried to get to know her. I was embarrassed by them and above all pissed off. Funny enough, we ran into Lucy Arnold in the bar because she lives in Princeton and went to the school across the street from mine, and we we're talking to with her. Close to when we we're going to leave, Iwi got up to say good bye to her, since she knew her a lot better than i ever did. While Iwi was gone the two boys sat there and then Sean after a bit said "when are we finally gonna leave?" Then evan said "As soon as kiwi or whatever her name is comes back." I broke. I completely broke at that point, biting back with "Thanks a lot guys. Her name is Iwi, you should know that. I am pissed right now." They looked at me like I was nuts. I told them that I felt like they made no effort to talk to her and they sat there in silence for several minutes, looking bored out of their minds. Finally, I got up and said "I'll go get Iwi so you can leave. Don't worry" followed by an exchange that can be be summed up as lame attempts to make me not feel like i had to get her and me bitterly saying over and over again, "oh no, don't bother."
I was crushed, completely crushed. How dare you treat my friend, one of my closest, like that EVER? How...dare...you? Writing this right now I'm crying thinking of how little they consider what I feel or think and more importantly, how Iwi must have felt to have two people treat her as if she was some random person. I am so annoyed, so incredibly hurt and feel as if what I think or feel means nothings. I mean nothing to them. If i did, they wouldn't have acted like complete assholes. My entire existence was belittled by these two jackasses and then they had the nerve to do it to Iwi. I have a voice, i have opinions, and above all, i have feelings that should be respected. And right now, I feel like shit under their shoes.
So much has been rambling around my head lately and I'm just confused about so much. I hate this feeling and I don't know how i got back here, having worked so hard to get myself out of my deep depression. Don't worry, it's not as bad as it has been, no where near, but i know this feeling, that feeling right before everything snowballs out of control. I had to write this to stop that snowball and I needed other people to know what I'm thinking because I know that all of you do care and have and listen to what i have to say. So thank you. From the bottom of my heart.
Wednesday, August 01, 2007
Mollie and Amanda's Last Hurrah
Well, here we are... it has been 4 wonderful years. On Friday Mollie goes down to Virginia and Amanda moves into her NYC apartment. But tonight was our last hurrah...
This hurrah included almost 2 bottles of Red Wine... and a hammock... a dangerous combination:
SOOOOOO... we take our almost full glasses of wine out to the hammock (already tipsy from knocking back the first bottle) and place them precariously on a table next to us.
Amanda says, "Now Mollie, you CANNOT knock these glasses over."
Mollie says, "I WON'T!"
The two girls sway in the hammock. Amanda's feet at Mollie's head and vice versa.
They decide it was time for another sip of wine. After a couple minutes of struggle and distraction provided by the neighbor's dog, so close to victory, they fall face forward onto the ground.
"How embarassing," thought the girls.
They decide to sit up facing the table this time. The two girls are swaying happily towards the table with their wine when the neighbor's dog starts barking yet again.
"COME HERE ALFIE!" screams the 70 year old lady standing mere FEET from the balancing girls.
Before they knew it, with wine in hand, the girls trying to adjust had toppled backwards onto the ground spilling wine EVERYWHERE (including all over Mollie's pretty clothes).
"WHA HAPPPPENED?????" the girls thought?
"Oh my!" said the neighbor, as the girls laughed ridiculously.
Sheepishly, Mollie and Amanda scurried off indoors leaving Alfie and the 70 year old woman behind.
They will miss Alfie and the hammock, but most importantly, they will miss each other. They were glad to finish on such a Mollie-and-Amanda-Ridiculous Note.
Love always,
Crazy1 and Crazy2
This hurrah included almost 2 bottles of Red Wine... and a hammock... a dangerous combination:
SOOOOOO... we take our almost full glasses of wine out to the hammock (already tipsy from knocking back the first bottle) and place them precariously on a table next to us.
Amanda says, "Now Mollie, you CANNOT knock these glasses over."
Mollie says, "I WON'T!"
The two girls sway in the hammock. Amanda's feet at Mollie's head and vice versa.
They decide it was time for another sip of wine. After a couple minutes of struggle and distraction provided by the neighbor's dog, so close to victory, they fall face forward onto the ground.
"How embarassing," thought the girls.
They decide to sit up facing the table this time. The two girls are swaying happily towards the table with their wine when the neighbor's dog starts barking yet again.
"COME HERE ALFIE!" screams the 70 year old lady standing mere FEET from the balancing girls.
Before they knew it, with wine in hand, the girls trying to adjust had toppled backwards onto the ground spilling wine EVERYWHERE (including all over Mollie's pretty clothes).
"WHA HAPPPPENED?????" the girls thought?
"Oh my!" said the neighbor, as the girls laughed ridiculously.
Sheepishly, Mollie and Amanda scurried off indoors leaving Alfie and the 70 year old woman behind.
They will miss Alfie and the hammock, but most importantly, they will miss each other. They were glad to finish on such a Mollie-and-Amanda-Ridiculous Note.
Love always,
Crazy1 and Crazy2
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